Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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