doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize