Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I have feelings that need drinking.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Randomize
