Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Randomize
