so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
My feet surprised me
Randomize
