I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
