god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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