doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
