That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Randomize
