you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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