i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
