i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
