Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
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