You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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