I don't think brook has ever known best
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
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