I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
You took a bar mat shot.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
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