i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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