i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
did you just send me my own nude
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize