turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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