I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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