how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize