Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
