I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
