if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
