You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
