i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
