I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
