im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize