Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I just threw up on my dentist
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
