So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize