if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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