escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
is wine microwaveable?
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
