If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
