And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I just want nice things and good sex
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
