Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
