I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
