hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize