I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
