HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
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