She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
