He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
My Higher Power is John Stamos
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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