i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Randomize
