That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Randomize
