WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Randomize