can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Randomize
