Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
