Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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