Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
