I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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