Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
